Destiny of a King: The Letter
by T. F. Crosby
Summary: NC0 At the end of all the turmoil, Harry decides somebody needs to hear what he has never told them. This is part of a future story.


_This is a short piece that belongs to a story I'm working on about Harry. He's writing down what he remembers of certain events that take place within the story. It begins with him just writing stuff down as if he's telling it to someone that wasn't a part of those events, but towards the end he changes it up a little and it turns into a letter to someone who had been a part of those events._

_It's almost an overview of the story itself. Coming from Harry's memories, many details that will be in the story won't be in here. But it shouldn't be too confusing. (Hopefully not at all. But you never know.)_

_I hope you like it._

**ZOIDS: NEW CENTURY ZERO**

**Destiny of a King: The Letter**

To me, suicide had always been incredibly stupid. It was for people who were weak; for those who were looking for the easy way out. It was for those who were too weak to face their problems, who didn't want to face their problems. I told myself I would never even _think_ about committing suicide. I was too strong for that. Man, was I proven wrong. I'm not as strong as I thought I was. I am weak. All humans are weak. Suicide isn't as straightforward as I made it out to be.

I tried it once. _Suicide._ I deliberately tried to kill myself. I will now say that I'm happy that I was unsuccessful at my attempt. I was unsuccessful because of Doc Toros. There's more to that man than meets the eye.

I'll never forget that day. It was strange really. I'd had a battle that morning. It would have made some sense had I lost. But the fact is, I won. I should have been thrilled. Benjamin and Sebastian were. That win put us into Class-A. the two robots went nuts. I wanted to be excited along with them. But no matter how hard I tried….

As I look back on it, I wouldn't've been happy had the win put my team into Class-S. I wouldn't've been happy had Leena asked me out on a date, or even whole-heartedly accepted a proposal of mine. I wouldn't've been happy had Leena told me she loved me. Besides, it was too late for that, anyway.

The Blitz Team was in the vicinity. After the battle, Bit came up to me and slapped me on the back. "Way to go, Harry," he said.

_Way to go? _I thought he'd lost his mind. Bit Cloud was paying me a compliment. Then he tells me I was awesome out there. Oh, yeah, he'd definitely lost his mind. Then Brad compliments me. "You looked better than Bit out there." Wasn't expecting that, I can tell you. Although Bit's expression almost made me smile. Almost. Then Leena…. "Hey, keep this up and we can get rid of Bit and bring you on." Wha—! Forget Bit losing his mind, I was losing my own!

The whole team wanted to throw a big celebration for me. I declined. I told them I was too tired. They seemed disappointed. I'm not sure why.

Benjamin and Sebastian were disappointed. I should have been happy and accepted. But I was too far gone to care. I'm not sure what caused my depression. I suppose it was many things; something that just built up over time. My unabashed pining for Leena always met with rejection. Whether it was through manipulation to get something for her Zoid or just blatant refusal. Sometimes, it came down to belittling. And yet I still pursued after her affections. And then I go and think Bit's trying to take her from me. Talk about delusional.

Then there was Bit's constant riding. But I don't think he truly realized what he was doing. I think Brad was more or less indifferent. Jamie didn't pay much attention. At least, that's the way I saw it.

What was that Leon said when one of those guys said they were trying to protect Leena from me? "Maybe you should be protecting Harry from Leena." That actually made me laugh.

Doc Toros…. I don't think I'll ever figure him out. He's a frackin' shop-a-holic. It's kinda creepy. If he's not buyin' ammo, Zoid parts or Zoids, he's buyin' Zoid models. He can get everyone excited over nothing. And he's often rather vague on a lot of points, especially in his stories. He can also be a little immature and obnoxious. But then, so can Bit and Leena. Even more so.

But even so, Doc Toros cares a lot for his family and team. Perhaps, he sees Brad, Bit and Jamie as his own. I believe he cares about people in general. The way he helped the Tigers Team. From what I've experienced, he doesn't like to see people get hurt, whether or not he considers them friends.

He cares a lot for people…even me. As I found out that day.

Those Zaber Fangs and that Lightning Saix did their job well. It was an incredible battle, an incredible win. But it didn't matter.

When I got back to the base with two very disappointed robots, I dismantled them. I shut them down and dismantled them. I imagine that's the first thing Doc, Brad and Bit saw when they got there. _Yeah…Brad and Bit came, too._

The second thing, the blood. After I dismantled the robots, I went into my room to find the Dragon Lord my father had given me for my fourteenth birthday. I always keep it sharp. I went back to where I dismantled Benjamin and Sebastian and stared at the two scrap piles for a while. I walked into the dining area. That's where I decided to slice my face, give myself a few scars.

I'm not sure why I chose the dining area. Perhaps it's because it's near the living room where my vid-phone is. The blood Doc and the Blitz Boys saw…that was from my face. I made it a point to take my shirt off first. I didn't want to chance my shirt soaking up any blood. I wanted it to hit the ground. I wanted it to pool on the floor. So I took my shirt off and got down onto my knees. And started to slice my face. The left cheek, then the right, horizontally across the cheekbone. Then I sliced from my forehead, above my left eye, and straight down my face, stopping at my jaw line. Similar to that scar that earth hockey player had. That one from Sweden that lived—how many centuries ago? Of course, he got his from a skate blade.

After I finished slicing myself, I leaned over, letting the blood drip. It pooled quite nicely. I know that sounds sick, but considering how I was feeling….

When the bleeding started to slow, I went back to my room and grabbed the hand gun I had stashed in my nightstand. Yeah, you heard right. Harry Champ had a hand gun.

When I had the gun, I walked into the living room. I was a little shaky. I knew whom I wanted to call, but I wasn't sure if they would care. But good ol' Doc proved me wrong.

I don't remember what I said when I called. I do remember holding the gun to my head…and crying. The tears seeped into the wounds on my face. They stung.

They were all there. Doc, Brad, Bit, Leena, Jamie. Even Leon and Naomi. I don't remember seeing anyone leave the room. I just remember Bit, Brad and Doc suddenly not being there. Leon told me some time later it was Bit who was the first one out of the room. I guess it was really Bit who proved me wrong.

I don't know how much time had passed before I shot myself. I was rambling about something. Can't remember what, though. Leon says he remembers. He says he can never forget it. He still hasn't told me what I said. He, Leena, Jamie and Naomi watched me as I shot myself. I missed my heart and hit my lung. I don't know why I moved the gun from my head to my chest.

I fell to my knees, blood oozing from my chest. I started to cough up blood as I looked back up at the screen. Leena had buried her face into Leon. I heard her sobbing. Naomi was crying, too. Leon and Jamie just looked at me in shock.

Apparently Doc, Brad and Bit had all crammed into Liger Zero. Doc said Leon contacted him and told him what had happened. Brad said if it had been possible for Doc to fall out of Liger, he would have. Leon said the color drained from all their faces when he told them I had shot myself.

I tried to stand up, but my body wouldn't let me. Leon told me later on that before I fell to my knees I mouthed four words to him that really shook him. "I don't wanna die."

I was ready to collapse completely when I heard Doc. "Harry! Harry!"

I heard myself say "Doc."

The next thing I knew, he was next to me, talking to me. Don't really remember what he said. I don't even remember what happened next. I just remember him holding me, talking to me, as if I were his own son.

Either Bit or Brad called the paramedics, not that it matters. Brad came back to the room, I remember hearing his voice. I felt pressure on my chest. I remember Doc just kept talking to me. "You're gonna be okay, Harry. Just hang in there. Come on, son. Don't you dare die on me!"

While I was in the hospital, Brad told me I had said "I'll try not to." I don't remember saying that. Then again, I don't remember a lot of things. It's probably better that way.

I never heard the paramedics arrive. The last thing I remember hearing was his voice. It was fuzzy. Something about getting me a Blade Liger if I pulled through.

Maybe I should get you a Blade Liger, Doc. You know, just for being there.

Leon said you never left my side while I was in the hospital. He said you wouldn't even leave my side to eat. They all had to force you to. I wish I could've seen that. Leon said you actually forced the doctors to set you up a cot in my room. I don't know how you managed that one. Jamie said you became irate when the doctors first refused to do so. That couldn't've been pretty.

I never thought anyone would ever do anything close to that for me, except my dad. And mom. And maybe my sister.

By the way, thanks for not saying anything to them. All three of them would've flipped had they known. Not to mention my 'new identity' thing, my smoking habit, and my whole deal with Uncle Romain and his goons woulda had their heads spinning. I wish they were still here for me to tell them.

Thanks for being there for me through everything. Especially losing them.

Oh, tell Brad I still owe him for getting me outta that mess in the canyon. The man's got a sharp eye. I know it's been two years, but hey, I'm a little slow.

And I still owe you for pulling me outta that hellhole my ever-so-loving uncle dragged me into. Not that I tried to resist. But I suppose if it wasn't for that hellhole I never would've met Kobus. Crazy Organoid. I always thought they didn't exist anymore. Once again, I was wrong.

I don't mind being wrong. Being wrong has worked out for me. And I believe Kobus agrees.

I can't believe it's been three years since that day I came to Uncle Romain. (Five if you want to start with that wonderful day I tried to kill myself.) Seems like it happened only yesterday. I know it's a little cliché, but it's true. Sometimes I wish I could rewind time and go back to being Harry Champ, a man destined to be king.

Am I still destined to be king? Who knows?

Destiny's a funny thing. Many believe that a man makes his own destiny. I suppose that's true to some extent. I mean, we make choices every day that push us to where we're supposed to be, to who we're supposed to become. Some kind of weird predestination kind of thing, maybe. I really don't understand any of it. I just hope that everything that's happened is for the good. That none of it is meaningless.

Do I believe in destiny? Not really sure. I suppose it doesn't really matter, does it, Doc?

Whether or nor I'm destined to be king remains uncertain. But what is certain, is that I am no longer Harry Champ. He died a long time ago. I'm Jago Hache and it's what I would like to be called. That's the only name I'll answer to.

But you know something, Doc, if you want, you can call me Harry. If I hear your voice calling that old name, I'll answer.

I can never forget what you've done for me, Doc. I owe you so much.

Harry

P. S. I promise I'll stop smoking. Eventually. Oh, and uh…the crew says "Hi." Benjamin and Sebastian want to thank you again. You know, for putting them back together.

_He laid the letter on his desk and smiled. Sighing, he leaned back in his chair. "You don't owe me a thing, Harry."_

**ZOIDS**

_And there it is. I hope it was good. Story coming soon._


End file.
